Do things seem to conspire against you?

Do you ever plan to do a ritual or ceremony whether for observing the dark and new moon or something other, only to find that things seem to conspire against you?

No matter how well prepared you think you are it just doesn’t gel. You might have forgotten a specific item you wanted to use, you’ve left it a bit to late, you repeated a phrase what feels like a hundred times or forgot to thank…(insert Deity, Spirit, Ancestor, Universe, other Being or whomever.) Or you have to split it into two halves because of some minor household fracas.

Does any of this actually matter in the grand scheme of things? Are our expectations to high?

I think there’s a lot of peer pressure in this pagan / witchy world on the perfect practice. And the pressures we place upon ourself to get it right because of this. Hands up who falls deep into that hole. (I hold my hand aloft) That somehow, if the ritual being performed isn’t planned to perfection, with impeccable timing and all your ducks in a row, it’s doomed to failure.

I don’t believe this to be the case. Life is not perfect. We live in a perfectly, imperfect world which goes by it’s own rules. So why should we expect ritual to be perfect?

Even with the best of intentions I guarantee you there will be interuptions. Even if you’ve asked others in your houshold for the time and space. There are always other extraneous influences beyond our control. The dog might walk all over the tarot cards, the cat might scorch it’s fur on a candle, the baby might start crying, the kids might start causing a ruckus and then there’s our own imperfections. The heart is willing but the heads just awol, we lost concentration at a crucial point, we lost our place in the text we’re reading or forgot the words, it’s to damned dark and we can’t even see the words, we burnt our fingers on the candle, scorched our own hair and tripped over the blasted dog. It could have turned into something from a comedy sketch with impeccable timing.

But…did it fail?

If we choose to believe things happen for a reason, whose to say at the heart of it all the Universe isn’t in the background laughing it’s arse off. That Deity, Ancestor or Spirit may just be kicking up a storm to see if you’ve got a sense of humour. The dog or cat decided it was time to lighten the mood. Good humour can go along way. And writing of humour what are the moments we remember in life the most. Apart from moments of grief, it’s those times we look back on which are sprinkled with humour which make us smile and laugh outright. Those “oh yeah, I remember when the cat nearly set it’s tail on fire” moments, later down the line we remember with humour. And by the same token we remember the ritual. Just for the record I’m not advocating anyone sets the cat on fire…EVER.

My point is sometimes when things don’t go according to plan, it could be for very good reasons. It could be to test our resolve, it could be we need to lighten up. However accomplished, we can’t account for the uplanned. How rare I believe it must be for anyone, no matter how long they’ve been performing ritual to get it perfectly right. Experience counts for a lot but with experience we take the unexpected and just roll with it.

So, no I don’t believe it failed.

My ritual for observing the dark and new moon did not go to plan. I did the release part outside early afternoon.

Firstly it was windy, I couldn’t easily get the candles lit. Then I felt self concious as our neighbour was shimmying his tractor about. Even though he probably didn’t even notice what I was doing tucked away by the honeysuckle. There was some horrendously, loud humming noise from the pig unit up the road. Which felt like it was emminating from the bowels of the earth the other side of the fence next to me. The incense kept going out. I couldn’t concentrate easily, when I read the words out I felt stupid and the wind to add to that doused me in smoke. Then it cap it all it started raining.

I didn’t get to the second half, the intention setting until about 8.30pm. I was to bloody hot stood in front of the fire, (fire because of burning intentions to release in both instances) I couldn’t see what I was reading so had to get a candle, I didn’t trip over the dog but she was complaining to me in her doggo way, I again couldn’t concentrate easily and I’d written two things down twice. Plus numerous other things.

Cheers Universe, nice one!

At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities.

Jean Houston

This is only my third time of intermittently observing the dark and new moon. It would be nice to make it a more regular occurance. But I have to accept it’s not always possible due to other commitments. Some of the things I’ve learned from these experiences are:

“Expect the unexpected.” It’s okay for whatever you’re doing not to be “okay.” However much you think you’ve got something covered it will undoubtedly not be. Be gracious with yourself, and others who may still need attention. It’s so easy to beat oneself up for not getting something right, forgetting something or not adhering to that perfect illusion of how it’ll be in our head but doing that doesn’t add anything to the ritual. It just makes the whole thing have an air of negativity. Being interrupted at a crucial moment or feeling self concious for me is a given especially living with others and furry friends. When it’s not perfect it’s easy to become frustrated, irritated, disappointed and feel like it’s failed.

Instead try and roll with it. The Universe can have a funny way of doing things sometimes so feel the humour that dances alongside. Pick up where you left off and if all else fails come back to it another time. Because it honestly doesn’t matter as long as it’s done. Most of the things we do welcome a little humour, we can sometimes take ourselves too seriously. But as always there’s a time and a place for everything. If we accept the perfectly imperfect what we’re doing becomes a lot easier handle. Things are never as detrimental as they may seem.

I was a little disapointed with my new moon observance but on reflection it was okay, perfectly imperfect in all its wonkyness. Forces beyond my control played their part but isn’t that why we do this thing anyway?

Comment below, I’d love to know your thoughts, I’m sure you’ve all got a tale or two up your sleeves.