All is flux, nothing stays still.
Plato

Hello magical folks, I know it’s been a few months since the last post.

It may seem as nothing is happening, you may think this blog has been discarded but as the quote above states nothing has been still. Looks are deceptive and whilst I’ve stepped back a little while from writing, I’ve still been active in all sorts of ways in the background.

It occured to me as I sat down to write, how fitting it is that this coincides with the new moon yet again. It was last month around new moon I sent out a pared down newsletter to let you know I was still here. And so from that cycle to this there’s been a definite ending, as I step into a new begining. In particular though whilst I was walking early this morning in the fog, I felt the strongest sense of stepping out of a bigger, overall cycle. Cycles within cycles, the spiral path continues onwards. I’ve been through a process this past month in particular and most of these processes cannot be seen outwardly. So with this end and begining time, I want to take a moment. Not least because its worthwhile to pause and ponder. Here I share with you a little bit of the journey.

In the begining

My esoteric path continues, stepping as always into the unknown. I never know where it will lead because I’ve chosen not to follow a prescriptive tradition. I’ve looked at all sorts of different practices but never thought I must solely adhere to one alone. Sometimes things come full circle and I return to some thing or element but with others I let go of them altogether. At times this journey feels as it’s been years in the making. Perhaps it has if I think of what is called a ‘soul contract’. My physical reality though is only three short years. Those three years have been an exploration of self discovery, healing and learning about the hidden magic of our world. I’m still only scratching the surface. I made a conscious choice to seek my own truth because it was to uncomfortable to stay where I was. An invisible tug wanted me to step forward. I’ve had a lot of fears, imagined and otherwise to work through. With this unfolding I’ve learnt I’m a seeker with an inquiring mind. To sink into the depths, to uncover what appears to be hidden. I’ve wandered down many paths each one leading onto another and another. But I’ve realised most of this journey to date is about the relationship I have with myself. Removing the barriers and blocks which hinder the discovery of my own soul’s truth. Peeling back the layers accumulated from living in a world that chooses which boxes to put me in and tells me what I must think, do, be and behave as. All these things I’ve unconsciously chosen to believe. This is the discovery of my own authenticity and opening myself to living from my heart-space. Stilling the ego and allowing my soul to dictate the path.

It is intensely complicated but at its essence it’s about a conscious choice.

Sprinkled with surrender, trust and belief.

The Invitation

With last months new moon I decided I’d do a small ritual. A simple, uncomplicated ceremony with one basic declaration, to let go of everything. By ‘letting go of everything’ I mean thoughts, patterns or loops which keep us limited and stifled rather than expansive. I felt a strong impulse to hit the reset button. It mostly concerned my mindset, I was fed up with myself & it extended into my physical space too. This is one of the reasons for restarting Sylvanhowl which I mentioned in the last newsletter. I was tired of viewing things from a place of fear, the what if’s and indecision. Swinging back and forth and not firmly choosing what I believe.

Fear comes in many forms, it can be covert and overt, it brings a lot of resistance to the letting go of patterns. Those ingrained ways which tend to bubble to the surface from the sub-concious. Narratives I’ve been brought up to believe, which have been reinforced over the years by the retelling of them to myself, by myself. I know some of the fears I hold are based on those what if’s I’ve mentioned. “What if I do this that may happen” Or feeling if I do a certain thing no good will come of it. These thoughts stem from the belief system I was raised with, along with subconscious barriers I’ve built in response to the world. Our whole world revolves around this fear based aproach and way of thinking. I’ve asked myself why is it we approach everything from this assumption?

The consequense is to be out of alignment with our soul. Living in a way which physically stops ourselves expanding to our greatest potential. It creates indecision and barriers, reinforcing a fearful approach to our spiritual practice. By way of example I’ve had people tell me not to do particular things because it will attract evil, (insert whatever entity, being or thing you want), that I must leave that to those who know better. You must stay away from ‘that thing’ it’s for the best. If this isn’t gatekeeping, then I don’t know what is.

All I’ve discovered so far points to this:

Everything is energy and like attracts like. Therefore if you approach your practice from the perspective of elevated consciousness, from the heart and a place of love. You will exist in a higher vibrational, energetic frequency or lets call it a ‘plane’. It’s not possible for these lower energies ‘this evil’ to reach this level or plane. It exists or is operating in a different plane. Therefore if, ‘like attracts like’, again love will attract love not evil entities. (I am rolling my eyes here) It’s not possible, the two things are incompatible. If on the other hand you choose to exist on that lower energetic plane and dabble with those energies, then you shouldn’t be suprised by what you attract. I’m tired of this constant fear based narrative, I see it everywhere no matter the spiritual practice, religion or subject. It’s time we stopped believing this and viewed everything from a place of love, oneness, conscious creation and a universe that wants us to thrive and be happy. From a place of elevated vibrational energy.

Crossing the divide

A phrase has been in my head a lot these past weeks and I’ve repeated it almost like a form of meditation but more specifically a mantra:

It’s this,

As above, so below. 
As within, so without.

I have a story to tell you relating to this phrase.

One day last week I was out walking with the dog contemplating the connectedness of all things. I was repeating these words as I was going along plus thinking of the universe being within us all. I stopped to look at my surroundings and turned my gaze to the sky. I thought how easy it is not to realise it extends beneath our feet. The sun was shining behind a billowing white cloud illuminating it from behind. Moving across underneath this was a smaller, grey cloud. Quite ordinary you might think, but this grey cloud was in a perfect heart shape. I was suprised and the only thing I could utter was ‘oh’ and then ‘wow’. I looked at this for what seemed ages with accompanying goose bumps till eventually I saw movement out the corner of my eye. A cyclist was coming up the road. After he passed I looked back to find it gone. Just a regular, ordinary, jumble of grey and white clouds in it’s place. This all happened in the blink of an eye. Now I had a choice to make. Did I choose to believe the Universe had sent a message to confirm my musings, letting me know I’m loved and on the right path. Or, did I choose to believe it was a random cloud that just happened to float by in that shape at that instant? This is just one of the many seeming synchronisities which have happened this past week since consciously choosing to take a particular direction.

The more I contemplate these words, the more important they become. They act as a mirror. They tell me what is above and below is all around me. I am part of the whole, a small but important part which has its role to play in the greater whole of consciousness. I am not separate from the Universe I am immersed within it. They also tell me I carry the Universe or source within me. I am a reflection of the whole and what I give I will recieve.

What my story illustrates is essentially what I have struggled with the whole time I’ve been on this journey. Conscious choice. The freedom of choice which we all have, in what we believe and fill our heads with. Surrendering to this process, however unknown, and trusting what’s presented, is to aid my soul’s growth. Flowing from that loving place of the heart and trusting my higher self to lead the way.

It’s like a great unravelling, unearthing my own innate, inner knowing from those beliefs taken on from others and the world. I can honestly say, this stuff isn’t easy, it’s a process of elimination. I have struggled a lot with seeking my own inner wisdom. Going inwards and asking myself for the answers and being kind and loving in the process.

Courage is not the absence of fear, 
but rather the judgement that  
something else is more important than fear. 
Ambrose Redman

This extraordinary turning point arose with a dilema I thought I had about something. As with most things of an unknown quantity and spiritual nature. My initial response is to have an ‘oh crap moment’ and then torture myself trying to predict that unknown outcome. This internal narrative which once helped now only serves to hold me back. It also stops other things entering my life. Things which could be life enhancing. It stops expansion. Changing this takes time and courage, it means being consciously aware. Asking myself if what I think or feel is actually my reality or the loop that’s being played or the stories I’ve been told or I tell myself. What I internalise and in turn put out into the world is important. Not only will it create the reality I receive but also influence how I interact with everything around me. Intent is everything and conscious creation is the basis for the experiences we encounter.

I made this brave decision to let go of fear based thinking, to surrender, trust and believe in the innate love of the Universal Consciousness. Having the courage to think from my heart with it’s higher, loving, energetic vibration where fears have no place. Walking the path of oneness, unity and connection to everything. Consciously creating my world within this higher plane. Expanding, growing and thriving.

This world is open to everyone and I invite you to join this path.